Koupa
-A remembrance
Forward: As one of two people who can comprehend Bee’s communication, I feel it is my duty to relay her sentiments regarding this tragic event. These are her thoughts and feelings, translated to the best of my ability. I hope I am capable of expressing how much she loved and respected him. As did I.
Honestly I don't think I could ever say enough.
"Somewhere far beyond this world- I feel nothing anymore..."
My brother, playmate, and friend: Please forgive me for not being by your side. I hope he told you what you meant to him, what you meant to all of us. Did he explain to you why, or just walk away? You were scared, confused… alone for the first time- and I wasn’t there for you. I didn’t know. I couldn’t know.
You stood proudly in the presence of greatness, but never in my shadow. Always willing to fly with me, your heart gave you more horsepower than the manual fathomed. Your spirit was so much greater than the sum of your foreign-made parts. Your greatness could not be measured in statistics. Cutting through the night as though you were born of it, you always kept up. You never backed down.
We protected each other in dangerous places. You sat with me when I was sad. You shouldered my burdens when I was tired. Cast to the ends of the earth, I knew I would never see you again, but that you would always be with me. Even in the darkest times, I can still see your comforting red glow, and I know I can follow it home. Though I drive alone now, I know that I am not.
I will always leave the spot next to me open for you. We will be together again, little brother. In this life or the scrap. I will not say goodbye.
19 September 2013
23 August 2013
The Batffleck Cometh
And with it comes the inevitable criticism which goes hand and hand with the casting of a well-known and much beloved character the good people of this great nation have grown up imagining. Especially when they fuck it up this bad.
Now I will admit I was skeptical at first when Henry Cavill was announced as the Man of Steel. I love Superman. And I loved Henry Cavill in The Tudors- but would I love them together? I’ve always been of the mindset that no one would ever be good enough to don that red cape; no one would ever be Christopher Reeve again. I was not very outspoken against the choice though, as honestly I could think of no other actor I would choose to take the role. I got the pleasure of being pleasantly staggered at the midnight premiere of Man of Steel, when Cavill stepped into that costume and owned it. Owned it like it was, and had always been, meant for him. So naturally the next step is to completely screw the franchise and turn his amazing portrayal into a farce by making his sequel into what is quite possibly the cruelest joke ever to be played on Geekdom- and make Ben Affleck the new Batman. When I first heard the news, I sent a mass text:
“The world has just ended. They’ve casted Ben Affleck as Batman. I’ll be in the apocalypse panic room eating spam.” And began to grieve.
I wonder how this could have possibly come to pass. I can’t imagine the phrase: “Do you know what this franchise really needs? Ben Affleck! He was so great in Gigli!” coming out of anyone’s mouth ever, so it probably went more like this:
“Well gee Wally, we really need to think about this. We’re sitting on a potential gold mine here, we’re really going to have to put a lot of legwork into finding the right guy. Or we could just use Affleck. He’s outside anyway.”
I can think of a whole host of things that would make a better Batman than Ben Affleck:
-The Aflac duck in a mask
-Laser cats
-My right foot
-A mannequin (actually that’s pretty much even keel)
-Snuffaluffagus (sp?)
-Kristen Stewart
In all seriousness, unlike when I was worried about Man of Steel there actually ARE actors I would prefer to see put on the cowl. Sit back and imagine for a moment the glory that would be Karl Urban as Batman. Let that sink in and lament for what should have been.
Now I actually liked Argo. I really did. Does one good movie make him a good enough actor to play Batman though? Are we really answering the immortal question "Where's Bane?" with "Argo fuck yourself?"
I received an email this morning, an attempt to talk me off of the ledge with all the soothing “ooba” of a maternity droid. I was reminded of the backlash and horror when Heath Ledger was first cast in what he made an iconic role as The Joker. I was reminded there are people with actual brains in their heads behind this decision. People who would not make this choice lightly over a mason jar of moonshine and a watermelon bong. And so I will calm down and give it a chance.
Better make it good, Armageddon man. Or it truly will be.
Now I will admit I was skeptical at first when Henry Cavill was announced as the Man of Steel. I love Superman. And I loved Henry Cavill in The Tudors- but would I love them together? I’ve always been of the mindset that no one would ever be good enough to don that red cape; no one would ever be Christopher Reeve again. I was not very outspoken against the choice though, as honestly I could think of no other actor I would choose to take the role. I got the pleasure of being pleasantly staggered at the midnight premiere of Man of Steel, when Cavill stepped into that costume and owned it. Owned it like it was, and had always been, meant for him. So naturally the next step is to completely screw the franchise and turn his amazing portrayal into a farce by making his sequel into what is quite possibly the cruelest joke ever to be played on Geekdom- and make Ben Affleck the new Batman. When I first heard the news, I sent a mass text:
“The world has just ended. They’ve casted Ben Affleck as Batman. I’ll be in the apocalypse panic room eating spam.” And began to grieve.
I wonder how this could have possibly come to pass. I can’t imagine the phrase: “Do you know what this franchise really needs? Ben Affleck! He was so great in Gigli!” coming out of anyone’s mouth ever, so it probably went more like this:
“Well gee Wally, we really need to think about this. We’re sitting on a potential gold mine here, we’re really going to have to put a lot of legwork into finding the right guy. Or we could just use Affleck. He’s outside anyway.”
I can think of a whole host of things that would make a better Batman than Ben Affleck:
-The Aflac duck in a mask
-Laser cats
-My right foot
-A mannequin (actually that’s pretty much even keel)
-Snuffaluffagus (sp?)
-Kristen Stewart
In all seriousness, unlike when I was worried about Man of Steel there actually ARE actors I would prefer to see put on the cowl. Sit back and imagine for a moment the glory that would be Karl Urban as Batman. Let that sink in and lament for what should have been.
Now I actually liked Argo. I really did. Does one good movie make him a good enough actor to play Batman though? Are we really answering the immortal question "Where's Bane?" with "Argo fuck yourself?"
I received an email this morning, an attempt to talk me off of the ledge with all the soothing “ooba” of a maternity droid. I was reminded of the backlash and horror when Heath Ledger was first cast in what he made an iconic role as The Joker. I was reminded there are people with actual brains in their heads behind this decision. People who would not make this choice lightly over a mason jar of moonshine and a watermelon bong. And so I will calm down and give it a chance.
Better make it good, Armageddon man. Or it truly will be.
26 June 2013
Thank You, Dude on AM1350 in Pueblo
This guy on the radio is discussing the Patriot Way, as it has been the subject of much debate lately. He is not even a Pat's fan, but is contesting the claims that the Patriot Way is dead and gone.
He's saying:
“The Patriot Way? What, you mean WINNING? Is that the Patriot way? Because they’re the winningest team in the NFL in the past decade? The Patriot way is winning with these unknown guys SOMEHOW. The Patriot Way is that you get arrested, you’re OUT. Patriots don’t do drugs in college. Patriots aren’t out getting injured in fights in strip clubs. The Patriot Way is NOT Tebowmania, it’s Tom Brady, who hasn't said one word about the loss of his favorite receiver.”
It goes on and on but I’m just gonna sit here and beam a minute, and bask in the glow of my epiphany that despite the trades this off season, we’re gonna pull through. And as he’s going on and on about what the Patriot Way is to him, I am comforted in the way that a well-written sermon may comfort a Christian in need. I feel the fuzzy glow of winningness. The warmth of the Patriot Way radiates within me once again. Patriots walk through the fire, they don’t get burned by it.
So thank you, whoever you are, guy on the Pueblo AM station that I can barely hear through the static of the aging radio and the clattering of the impact printers behind me. Guy whose voice is calling me through the ringing phone and annoying office chitchat.
YOU have restored my faith in my team.
11 June 2013
Anakin, You're Going Down a Path I Can't Follow
I've never been a "fair weather fan" of the Patriots- but to be fair, the weather has ALWAYS been fair in New England. Even when we're not winning, we're still never really losing. I can always count on them to be a strong playoff team, and the people that hate them only hate because they wish they were that good. I can be proud of my team, and hecklers can be silenced quickly with fact.
This off-season however, I've been forced into a corner with mouth agape and soul aching, able to do nothing but wonder: What the bloody hell are they thinking?
Few pairing in the NFL were as magically synched as Tom Brady and Wes Welker. The Supercouple were unstoppable together, their brains seamlessly weaving plays up and down the field for record holding stats. So they decided not to re-sign Welker, and instead let him go to the Broncos to play under my secondmost hated enemy- Peyton Manning. Why would they hurt me in this way? I lamented for weeks the loss of my favorite Patriot. The hurt is still ebbing within my poor broken football heart. My DubDub....signed to the team I've sworn to despise since being exiled to this awful expanse of misery. Top that off with losing Danny Woodhead, tiny missile extraordinnaire....and I thought things couldn't get worse.
Oh, but they got worse. Much, MUCH, worse. With the announcement that Tim Tebow is being signed, the bottom caved out of my pain and fandom is spiraling downward uncontrollably.
I have hated Tim Tebow and everything about him since first hearing his name. A schmeh performance, quickly followed by a media explosion. Really, is that all it takes to get Denver excited now? An OK player with a gimmick? Soon there were t-shirts, memes, and the vomit inducing mass amounts of "Tebowing." I seethed every time I heard his overhyped name. And now, they're bringing him to New England. To MY team. To MY boys, where this ridiculous attention whore surely does NOT belong. I tried to forget what I'd heard. I tried to ignore it. I tried to look at it as though he's a lost puppy and we're the good guys for adopting him so he can be trained properly- but that wont make him any less Tebow. And it won't make his name taste any better when i venomously spit it out.
After hearing my maniacal raving on the matter, Nighthawk offered this:
"I wouldnt be so quick to write this off.
1-Belichick(as much as I hate to admit it) seems to be ahead of the power curve in most respects.
2-Tebow has been working out since the draft with renowned quarterback's coach Steve Clarkson who says he's managed to fix Tebow's mechanics
2a-This was also signed off on by quarterbacks coach Chris Weinke
3-hellmushamouthamuthfuckasingingscreamin HALLELUJAH GOAT
4-He's shed 20+ pounds and more in football shape
5-you know old man brady will get hurt at some point and you'll see him, so prepare for it now."
~~ Note that point 3 was in reference to a different part of the conversation~~
EVEN IF he does well, EVEN IF the team can still function after losing vital players...he's still Tebow. The LAST person on EARTH that deserves to be a Patriot. Why are they doing this to me? Are they testing my loyalty by removing everything I love about the team and adding someone I need a stronger word than hate to describe?
One thing is for sure- While I'm not giving up on my Pats, my Ravens and Eagles jerseys will be heavy in the rotation this season.
04 February 2013
Quoth the Ravens, "LOMBARDI BITCHEZ!!"
Once upon an evening dreary,
Colin pondered, weak and weary,
Over a many quaint and curious volume of forgotten plays.
While he pondered, seeming napping, suddenly Jim came a slapping whilst beyonce was a' rapping, tapping heels across the floor. "Tis only halftime now" he muttered, "stop slapping my locker door." He tried his best, and nothing more.
Ah, distinctly he remembered, that it was the bleak December, And each separate dying ember wrought its ghost upon the floor. Eagerly he wished the morrow; - vainly he had sought to borrow from his books surcease of sorrow - sorrow for the lost Lombardi -
For the rare and radiant trophy whom the angels named Lombardi -
stolen here, just like the score.
And the silken sad uncertain rustling of each purple curtain
Thrilled him, filled him with fantastic terrors never felt before;
So that now, to still the beating of his heart, he stood repeating
`'Tis some nightmare, for surely this just cannot be the score -
Some late prank entreating effecting what is called the score; -
This it is, and nothing more,'
Presently his soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer,
`Sir,' said he, `or Harbaugh,
truly your forgiveness I implore;
But its halftime, I was napping, and so rudely you came rapping,
And so faintly you came flapping, flapping gums about the score,
That I scarce was sure I heard you' - here he opened wide the door; -
Darkness there, and nothing more.
Deep into that darkness peering, long he stood there wondering, fearing,
Doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before;
But the silence was unbroken, and the darkness gave no token,
And the only word there spoken was the whispered word, `Lombardi!'
This he whispered, and an echo murmured back the word, `Lombardi'
Merely this and nothing more.
Back onto the field now turning, all his soul within him burning,
Soon again he heard a murmuring, somewhat louder than before.
`Surely,' said he 'surely that is something at my left, Let me see then, where's the threat, and how is this the score -
Let my heart be still a moment and this mystery explore; -
'Tis the wind and nothing more!'
Spinning here he flung with shudder, when, with many a flirt and flutter,
In there stepped a stately raven of the college days of yore.
Not the least obeisance made he; not a minute stopped or stayed he;
But, with mien of lord or lady, perched above where showed the score -
Perched upon a field sublime, just above where showed the score -
Perched, and sat, and nothing more.
Then this ebony bird beguiling Colin's sad fancy into smiling,
By the grave and stern decorum of the countenance it wore,
`Though thy crest be shorn and shaven, thou,' he said, `art sure no craven.
Ghastly grim and ancient raven wandering from the nightly shore -
Tell me what thy lordly name is on the Night's New Orleans shore!'
Quoth the raven, `Nevermore.'
Kaepernick marvelled this ungainly fowl to hear discourse so plainly,
(Shortened because I'm tired of typing.)
`Be that word our sign of parting, bird or fiend!' Colin shrieked upstarting -
`Get thee back into the tempest and the Night's New Orleans shore!
Leave no black plume as a token of that lie thy soul hath spoken!
Leave my loneliness unbroken! - quit the field, go out the door!
Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy form from off my score!'
Quoth the raven, `Nevermore.'
21 November 2012
Oh, Sugar, You Just Gone and Done the Dumbest Thing...
Fake Geek Girl. i.e., a female who attempts to infiltrate the tightly knit subculture of geekdom by using her "wiles" and pretending to be "into geeky things" when she isn't actually interested, to the catastrophically deviant endgame of...well...I don't think the idiots that developed this idea have gotten that far yet. I'm fairly certain all they've got is: "Well, they trick us into liking them, and looking at them, and...and...it makes them feel better about themselves...which is bad and makes us furious because they don't actually know anything about being a geek!"
Oh yeah. This is actually a thing, and it's actually happening, and as of now- its actually pissed me off.
Apparently, the "Fake Geek Girl" (I'm just going to use "Feek" from now on, if that's okay with you) dresses up and goes to conventions without actually knowing the entire and complete back story of her character, down to that last nuance-y fling with Daredevil in that one issue no one ever talks about. Oh the horror! She's the Booth Babe who is only there and dressed like that to collect a paycheck, because no one needs money in today's economy. She's the girl in the gamer t-shirt who can't completely follow the conversation the guys she just met are having about Portal. She's...holy cannoli, she's EVERYWHERE!!
---- Except she ISN'T.
The origins of the Feek BS lie with some misogynistic elitists of BOTH genders, yes women can hate women- keep up, who have a deep seeded hatred of cosplay, i.e., dressing up in costume. Cosplay. COStume PLAY. They felt that cosplayers are just "playing dress-up" in order to gain power through feeding off the lust of lower mortals who happen to gaze upon their spandex-clad bodies, and have no real respect for the costume they've donned. This is half correct- people in costumes have in fact put on costumes. Very profound. However, in all of the conventions I have been to, never have I ever seen the swirling pale blue wisps indicative of someones life force being drained and used to increase the power of another. Should anyone actually see this happening, then that succubus is definitely a Feek, and someone should use a binding spell on her at once before our community is tainted by her fakeness.
Another argument I've heard is the: "But we were outcast for our geekdom, and now THEY just get to show up and be socially accepted! They must be fake because only a TRUE geek knows what it's like to eat lunch alone in the bathroom because you don't fit in."
First of all, it was my CAR, not the bathroom. And I ate there because I wanted to. Stupid cafeteria was too crowded anyway. I didn't want their stupid chairs and their stupid foam trays and laughter and friends and their stupid stupidness.
~-- And now, a digression--~
My first car, FYI, was a 1974 Beetle. And it was yellow, and it was BUMBLEBEE, and it was freaking AWESOME because of that. Thus, it really grinds my gears when someone who doesn't know my love of the Robots in Disguise goes WAY back (the original movie in 1984 came out on my birthday, it was my first trip to the movies) looks at my yellow 2010 camaro and claims I only got it to look like the movies. Yes, I got it because it's Bumblebee, but not to jump on the movie bandwagon- but because it's freaking AWESOME. And if someone else got theirs because of the movies and it sparked an intrest for Transformers in them--- THAT'S OKAY!!!
Back to being picked on...
So what we're saying now is basically "eff you, noobs, you can't come in until you have been publicly rejected by all other groups?" That is flaming ridiculous, and here's why:
Newsflash homies, this country is NOT what the world was when we were growing up. It's a wee more tolerant. And who are we to fault the newer generation for wanting in on our little slice of the pi? Media has now made us cool. But does being the new cool mean we have to become the new bullies and exclude everyone else? Didn't that treatment make us who WE are? So by closing our clubhouse off would we not just be inviting a new subculture of diet Geeks to form? HAS BATTLESTAR GALACTICA TAUGHT YOU NOTHING!!! THEY WILL EVOLVE AND REBEL AND THEY WILL COME AFTER US!!!!! Oh nerdmanity, ye be warned.
Because of this new call for identifying and casting out Feeks, any girl showing any interest in anything geeky is now branded fake until her GeekCred can be proven. I do not agree with this. Lets go back to the "who is the fake geek girl" section several paragraphs ago. Remember the girl in the costume that didn't know the whole back story? Why exactly does that make her fake? Maybe she's new to the whole comic scene, and she really is passionate about it, but just doesn't have the ions of spare time it would take to suss out every issue her character has ever popped a thought bubble in? Now that DC has put out its New 52 lines, that CANNOT be used as a measuring stick anymore. Everything is new and the whole POINT of that was to bring in new people, give people a chance to get into this world on a (not the, but a) ground floor. SO what does that say about us as a group that we would invite people in then instantly brand them a fake because they don't know "enough?" Say there's a younger girl who has recently started reading Batgirl. She really loves the character, and the whole Gotham scene, and she'd like to take the next step and hit a convention. She's new to comics, but she loves what she knows so far, and she assumes that at a convention- she won't be ostracized for her new love. This story can end two ways. She can get to the convention and be met by an inquisition into her knowledge of Batgirl, then belittled for the blank look on her face at the mention of Betty Kane, branded a fake, leave the convention and never pick up a comic again...OR, she can have a GREAT time, meeting people with similar interests, pick up some NEW interests (I hear Aquaman is badass,) and leave with new friends, a bag full of stuff, and a fresh desire to go back BEYOND the new stuff and read everything she can get her hands on. Which sounds better to you? Which sounds like the path we wanted offered to us when we were her age? Everyone starts somewhere, why turn them off the path at the starting line?
Also, just because someone doesn't know EVERYTHING about EVERYTHING does not mean they don't know ANYTHING about SOMETHING. I own an Xbox, I have an above average knowledge of video games, but my knowledge is mostly SNES era. I'm working on getting better at the new stuff, but always feel like as soon as I start getting the hang of things it's time to put the controller down. I would hate to be considered a Feek because I suck at first person shooters. Would that really be fair? What if someone is so wired to Halo their trigger finger twitches in their sleep, but doesn't remember the Oregon Trail? Do we cast them out then?
A brief note on Booth Babes: Advertising with scantily clad models is on its way out, but I feel as though it needs to be said that these girls aren't Feeks, because they aren't TRYING to be geeks. They're selling a product, and earning a check to do it. I've done this job oodles of times, and that does not instantly wipe all my knowledge of Super Heroes, or mean I'm fake. It means I got to do something I was going to do anyway (go to cons in costume) for FREE, *AND* get paid to do it. My case there is not the norm, my employer was always kind enough to let me select/make/wear my own costumes, and gave me ample time to sniff around and enjoy the convention between bouts of passing out flyers and peddling wares. One can be both a geek and a Booth Babe, but someone who is JUST a Booth Babe isn't posing as a geek- she's posing for pictures as a salesman.
This brings me to another argument I've heard: "She's definitely a Fake Geek, she's too pretty."
If you've ever said this- someone needs to punch you in the middle of your face until their hand breaks. Being pretty does not exclude someone from the ability to possess knowledge of and enjoy all of the wonderful things our culture has to offer. A pretty girl is not the equivalent of a stupid girl. Grow up. Stop stereotyping me, and I'll stop assuming you hook your suspenders to your underoos.
Why is this worth Dragon Rage?
I ran to the store earlier for some essential ingredients needed to turn a whole pumpkin into a pie. I do that. Turn pumpkins into pies. It's labor intensive and a hateful process but a pie from scratch is so much cooler than a pie from a can. Anyway, I'm wearing my Schrödinger's Cat is Dead/Not Dead shirt, and I barely heard someone say "She doesn't even know what her shirt means" before he disappeared. I've never had anyone try to question my geekdom before. I'd be a pretty invested fake if that were the case. Heaven forbid I finally get my comic shop open only to discover years down the line that I've been faking this whole time, and I'm not really interested. Un-frigging-likely. Does the fact that I also love sports and cars diminish my geeky light? My hot wheels have sat on my desk next to the Daleks for quite some time now, and no one has been exterminated. The Lego AT-AT Walker has not begun shooting at me for my rebellion. Do I have enough toys and knowledge to keep my credibility as a geek? The other night I heard someone in a restaurant say my friend and I were only wearing glasses to look cool...OR, I wear them because I'm blind as a bat and didn't want to rely on sonar to see my Vietnamese food.
So where is the line? How far do they think so-called Feeks are willing to go to pretend? I feel that if they've invested any time or energy into their geeky niche, that gives them credibility. There is no "Wannabe" Geek, but there is "New" Geek. And we shouldn't be denying anyone the title of "Geek" if they want it. Why would pretending to be a geek even be a thing? And why does the prospect upset people so much? If someone decides they want to fake their way through a conversation or a convention, it isn't hurting anyone. Someone's lack of knowledge doesn't detract from my own. If someone enjoys comics or gaming but it isn't their life, they aren't fake because they still ENJOY it, they just have other things in their lives too. And that's OKAY. A world where we have to constantly prove our worthiness of the Geek title through trials and tests of knowledge sounds suspiciously like proving our prowess through one-handed push-ups. We know what world that is, because it's the one that cast us out initially. Let us not become that world. And for all we know, the guy or girl doing the one-handed push-ups has a huge Thor collection that they'd really like to be able to talk about with someone, but are too afraid of not being accepted. Geek shouldn't be an exclusive club, it should be open admission to anyone who loves the culture. If you love geekdom, find acceptance here. That's how we all ended up here after all, isn't it? To find acceptance for the things we love?
Oh yeah. This is actually a thing, and it's actually happening, and as of now- its actually pissed me off.
Apparently, the "Fake Geek Girl" (I'm just going to use "Feek" from now on, if that's okay with you) dresses up and goes to conventions without actually knowing the entire and complete back story of her character, down to that last nuance-y fling with Daredevil in that one issue no one ever talks about. Oh the horror! She's the Booth Babe who is only there and dressed like that to collect a paycheck, because no one needs money in today's economy. She's the girl in the gamer t-shirt who can't completely follow the conversation the guys she just met are having about Portal. She's...holy cannoli, she's EVERYWHERE!!
---- Except she ISN'T.
The origins of the Feek BS lie with some misogynistic elitists of BOTH genders, yes women can hate women- keep up, who have a deep seeded hatred of cosplay, i.e., dressing up in costume. Cosplay. COStume PLAY. They felt that cosplayers are just "playing dress-up" in order to gain power through feeding off the lust of lower mortals who happen to gaze upon their spandex-clad bodies, and have no real respect for the costume they've donned. This is half correct- people in costumes have in fact put on costumes. Very profound. However, in all of the conventions I have been to, never have I ever seen the swirling pale blue wisps indicative of someones life force being drained and used to increase the power of another. Should anyone actually see this happening, then that succubus is definitely a Feek, and someone should use a binding spell on her at once before our community is tainted by her fakeness.
Another argument I've heard is the: "But we were outcast for our geekdom, and now THEY just get to show up and be socially accepted! They must be fake because only a TRUE geek knows what it's like to eat lunch alone in the bathroom because you don't fit in."
First of all, it was my CAR, not the bathroom. And I ate there because I wanted to. Stupid cafeteria was too crowded anyway. I didn't want their stupid chairs and their stupid foam trays and laughter and friends and their stupid stupidness.
~-- And now, a digression--~
My first car, FYI, was a 1974 Beetle. And it was yellow, and it was BUMBLEBEE, and it was freaking AWESOME because of that. Thus, it really grinds my gears when someone who doesn't know my love of the Robots in Disguise goes WAY back (the original movie in 1984 came out on my birthday, it was my first trip to the movies) looks at my yellow 2010 camaro and claims I only got it to look like the movies. Yes, I got it because it's Bumblebee, but not to jump on the movie bandwagon- but because it's freaking AWESOME. And if someone else got theirs because of the movies and it sparked an intrest for Transformers in them--- THAT'S OKAY!!!
Back to being picked on...
So what we're saying now is basically "eff you, noobs, you can't come in until you have been publicly rejected by all other groups?" That is flaming ridiculous, and here's why:
Newsflash homies, this country is NOT what the world was when we were growing up. It's a wee more tolerant. And who are we to fault the newer generation for wanting in on our little slice of the pi? Media has now made us cool. But does being the new cool mean we have to become the new bullies and exclude everyone else? Didn't that treatment make us who WE are? So by closing our clubhouse off would we not just be inviting a new subculture of diet Geeks to form? HAS BATTLESTAR GALACTICA TAUGHT YOU NOTHING!!! THEY WILL EVOLVE AND REBEL AND THEY WILL COME AFTER US!!!!! Oh nerdmanity, ye be warned.
Because of this new call for identifying and casting out Feeks, any girl showing any interest in anything geeky is now branded fake until her GeekCred can be proven. I do not agree with this. Lets go back to the "who is the fake geek girl" section several paragraphs ago. Remember the girl in the costume that didn't know the whole back story? Why exactly does that make her fake? Maybe she's new to the whole comic scene, and she really is passionate about it, but just doesn't have the ions of spare time it would take to suss out every issue her character has ever popped a thought bubble in? Now that DC has put out its New 52 lines, that CANNOT be used as a measuring stick anymore. Everything is new and the whole POINT of that was to bring in new people, give people a chance to get into this world on a (not the, but a) ground floor. SO what does that say about us as a group that we would invite people in then instantly brand them a fake because they don't know "enough?" Say there's a younger girl who has recently started reading Batgirl. She really loves the character, and the whole Gotham scene, and she'd like to take the next step and hit a convention. She's new to comics, but she loves what she knows so far, and she assumes that at a convention- she won't be ostracized for her new love. This story can end two ways. She can get to the convention and be met by an inquisition into her knowledge of Batgirl, then belittled for the blank look on her face at the mention of Betty Kane, branded a fake, leave the convention and never pick up a comic again...OR, she can have a GREAT time, meeting people with similar interests, pick up some NEW interests (I hear Aquaman is badass,) and leave with new friends, a bag full of stuff, and a fresh desire to go back BEYOND the new stuff and read everything she can get her hands on. Which sounds better to you? Which sounds like the path we wanted offered to us when we were her age? Everyone starts somewhere, why turn them off the path at the starting line?
Also, just because someone doesn't know EVERYTHING about EVERYTHING does not mean they don't know ANYTHING about SOMETHING. I own an Xbox, I have an above average knowledge of video games, but my knowledge is mostly SNES era. I'm working on getting better at the new stuff, but always feel like as soon as I start getting the hang of things it's time to put the controller down. I would hate to be considered a Feek because I suck at first person shooters. Would that really be fair? What if someone is so wired to Halo their trigger finger twitches in their sleep, but doesn't remember the Oregon Trail? Do we cast them out then?
A brief note on Booth Babes: Advertising with scantily clad models is on its way out, but I feel as though it needs to be said that these girls aren't Feeks, because they aren't TRYING to be geeks. They're selling a product, and earning a check to do it. I've done this job oodles of times, and that does not instantly wipe all my knowledge of Super Heroes, or mean I'm fake. It means I got to do something I was going to do anyway (go to cons in costume) for FREE, *AND* get paid to do it. My case there is not the norm, my employer was always kind enough to let me select/make/wear my own costumes, and gave me ample time to sniff around and enjoy the convention between bouts of passing out flyers and peddling wares. One can be both a geek and a Booth Babe, but someone who is JUST a Booth Babe isn't posing as a geek- she's posing for pictures as a salesman.
This brings me to another argument I've heard: "She's definitely a Fake Geek, she's too pretty."
If you've ever said this- someone needs to punch you in the middle of your face until their hand breaks. Being pretty does not exclude someone from the ability to possess knowledge of and enjoy all of the wonderful things our culture has to offer. A pretty girl is not the equivalent of a stupid girl. Grow up. Stop stereotyping me, and I'll stop assuming you hook your suspenders to your underoos.
Why is this worth Dragon Rage?
I ran to the store earlier for some essential ingredients needed to turn a whole pumpkin into a pie. I do that. Turn pumpkins into pies. It's labor intensive and a hateful process but a pie from scratch is so much cooler than a pie from a can. Anyway, I'm wearing my Schrödinger's Cat is Dead/Not Dead shirt, and I barely heard someone say "She doesn't even know what her shirt means" before he disappeared. I've never had anyone try to question my geekdom before. I'd be a pretty invested fake if that were the case. Heaven forbid I finally get my comic shop open only to discover years down the line that I've been faking this whole time, and I'm not really interested. Un-frigging-likely. Does the fact that I also love sports and cars diminish my geeky light? My hot wheels have sat on my desk next to the Daleks for quite some time now, and no one has been exterminated. The Lego AT-AT Walker has not begun shooting at me for my rebellion. Do I have enough toys and knowledge to keep my credibility as a geek? The other night I heard someone in a restaurant say my friend and I were only wearing glasses to look cool...OR, I wear them because I'm blind as a bat and didn't want to rely on sonar to see my Vietnamese food.
So where is the line? How far do they think so-called Feeks are willing to go to pretend? I feel that if they've invested any time or energy into their geeky niche, that gives them credibility. There is no "Wannabe" Geek, but there is "New" Geek. And we shouldn't be denying anyone the title of "Geek" if they want it. Why would pretending to be a geek even be a thing? And why does the prospect upset people so much? If someone decides they want to fake their way through a conversation or a convention, it isn't hurting anyone. Someone's lack of knowledge doesn't detract from my own. If someone enjoys comics or gaming but it isn't their life, they aren't fake because they still ENJOY it, they just have other things in their lives too. And that's OKAY. A world where we have to constantly prove our worthiness of the Geek title through trials and tests of knowledge sounds suspiciously like proving our prowess through one-handed push-ups. We know what world that is, because it's the one that cast us out initially. Let us not become that world. And for all we know, the guy or girl doing the one-handed push-ups has a huge Thor collection that they'd really like to be able to talk about with someone, but are too afraid of not being accepted. Geek shouldn't be an exclusive club, it should be open admission to anyone who loves the culture. If you love geekdom, find acceptance here. That's how we all ended up here after all, isn't it? To find acceptance for the things we love?
12 March 2012
Manning Up
I admit, not the cleverest of titles.
There's not a whole lot of great wordplay's out there for Peyton Manning though; MANning DOWN!, Placing Peyton, Guy With Copiously Large Forehead...
Peyton Manning, former fulcrum of the Indianapolis Colts is roaming about the country looking for a new team to call home after being out with an injury for the entire last season which resulted in the Colts winning what, maybe one game?
I'm of the mindset that the Colts wouldn't have let him go, seeing as they've proven that winning without him defies the laws of physics, if he was still worth anything (to this, Anthony replies "Andrew Luck", which brings to mind many colorful quips to be used in the future about luck running out.) However, nearly every team is scrambling to woo the aging quarterback to their locker rooms. Why? He's old and injured. The chances of him Favre-ing out are way bigger than the chances of him marching some half rate team to new victorious heights. Am I the only person that see's this?
Anthony says I'm "100% wrong. Wrong and wronger." Which is a lot of wrong when you stack it all up. I guess time will tell, and we'll see later this year.
P.S.- "Farve-ing Out": verb. The act of being an old slightly washed up quarterback trying so hard to reclaim his youth and former glory that he refuses to see his own irrelevance, to the point of tarnishing old "legendary" status with mockery and you-tube parodies.
There's not a whole lot of great wordplay's out there for Peyton Manning though; MANning DOWN!, Placing Peyton, Guy With Copiously Large Forehead...
Peyton Manning, former fulcrum of the Indianapolis Colts is roaming about the country looking for a new team to call home after being out with an injury for the entire last season which resulted in the Colts winning what, maybe one game?
I'm of the mindset that the Colts wouldn't have let him go, seeing as they've proven that winning without him defies the laws of physics, if he was still worth anything (to this, Anthony replies "Andrew Luck", which brings to mind many colorful quips to be used in the future about luck running out.) However, nearly every team is scrambling to woo the aging quarterback to their locker rooms. Why? He's old and injured. The chances of him Favre-ing out are way bigger than the chances of him marching some half rate team to new victorious heights. Am I the only person that see's this?
Anthony says I'm "100% wrong. Wrong and wronger." Which is a lot of wrong when you stack it all up. I guess time will tell, and we'll see later this year.
P.S.- "Farve-ing Out": verb. The act of being an old slightly washed up quarterback trying so hard to reclaim his youth and former glory that he refuses to see his own irrelevance, to the point of tarnishing old "legendary" status with mockery and you-tube parodies.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)